he is right….

you know.. i figured out today.. that he is right….
i should deal with this… there is no point in sitting around feeling sorry for myself…
its been over a month since he has been gone…. i shouldn’t be like this. Because obviously.. we both ain’t willing to put anything in it… he isn’t fighting..i’m not fighting… so really.. there is no point in just holding onto memories.

Heartache or what not.. sitting at home… isn’t helping me.. and you know what? hope doesn’t do it for me either.
We had a fight last night.. which is good… this way… we stop talking to each other.. and dragging this process more and more out….

i should look forward.. to… a new me… hahaha. lol. if that makes sense….and come monday… booking the rest of my tour.. seeing as i’m away this weekend.. a mini holiday… just before my big holiday! heehehee

5 weeks in europe… should be fun.. i’m single.. i’m going on a crazy tour… and.. should def. have the time of my life.. and experience new things… like staying in a hostel.. for the first time of my life.. and travelling soooo alone. lol. (sounds scary doesn’t it? )… i say 5… although i am still contemplating going home later… which is more likely… at this stage.. there is this 1 more tour i’d like to go on… lets say.. finish my trip off with a bang? lol. a mini bday present to myself!!!!
Oh well… this year.. no bday parties… even though.. the date is perfect… 09/09/09.. now seriously.. and people wonder why my favourite number is 9. lol.

My dad told me not to go over and fall in love again. hahahaa sighs.. SO not going to do that… i think i’ll stick to someone close to home.. like in the same state at least! Well… at least i feel better today… last night was… good… it really was an ending. He made it clear.. so there isn’t hope anymore…
plus waking up at 3am…. this morning.. lying in bed…. just thinking about everything… helped alot.

lets turn this blog around…… its just been soooo emo lately.

Port stephens in 2 hours.. woot.. excited… i hope the weather is nice.. well..today is nice.. its sunny.. but obviously going up north means its warmer!

~ by maishirlz on July 10, 2009.